'Dorm-prison': how a Russian woman and her daughter live in a New York homeless shelter

Gulnara Khamatova is a photographer from Kazan. She said Voice of America about his life with his little daughter in a New York orphanage.

Gulnara graduated from university in Kazan, then moved to Moscow. There she had big problems with renting a place because of her name and appearance.

“I just freaked out, put all my things in the garage for storage and left. First I moved to Europe, then I decided to try to live in New York for several months,” the migrant shared. “When I arrived, I immediately realized that this was absolutely my city, that I was not ugly here, not a Khachik, not old.”

An unexpected miracle

From the age of 17, doctors told Gulnara that she would not be able to get pregnant on her own. Since childhood, she has taken medications that lead to infertility.

At 39, she accidentally became pregnant and gave birth to a daughter.

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“We go to kindergarten. Magically, in some incomprehensible way, we were lucky to get there,” admitted Gulnara.

“My husband and I got married. We had a passionate relationship: we constantly broke up and got back together. It was all very dramatic, like in a movie,” she said.

Gulnara was subjected to emotional abuse. She decided to take her daughter and leave her husband. So she got into shelter for victims of domestic violence.

Victim of abuse

“Every time they tell me in the shelter that I am a victim of abuse, I immediately have resistance: well, of course! I am not a victim of abuse, not a victim! The marriage just didn’t work out,” Gulnara noted. “And only later, when some social workers come and explain and give examples, then you understand that yes, this is so. It's just very difficult to come to the realization of this. I didn’t understand what it was, I didn’t know. In Russia we are not taught this as children. Even if your husband beats you for the slightest offense, it is considered that he loves you.”

Dorm-prison

Gulnara and her daughter live in a shelter. She was unable to find housing.

“I resisted going to the shelter, but in February such a situation arose that, unfortunately, I had no other choice. My daughter needed a roof over her head,” the migrant explained. – The shelter is a kind of hostel-prison. Firstly, there is a curfew - you need to return to the shelter before 21:00. Every time you leave the shelter, even if you just went across the street to run to the store, you must be with your daughter and must register in the register. There is another log in which you should check in daily - as proof that you were, in principle, present in the shelter that day. You need to register in another register if your child goes to kindergarten.”

There are other, no less strict shelter rules.

“There's security on every floor, and you have to tell them which floor you're going to. You cannot visit other residents. You can only be together in public places. There is a metal detector at the entrance. Whenever you leave the shelter, you must leave your keys at the reception. Children are not allowed to run around the shelter without shoes, and they are not allowed to run at all,” she complains. – There are a lot of restrictions on what you can have in the room and what you can’t. Every evening there is a check - they knock on the doors. If you don’t answer, they open the rooms and check to see if everything is okay, if someone has taken too much drugs or maybe someone has become ill.”

Gulnara says that many people give almost new things to children.

“We recently brought in a doll house. Found here on the street on the way from kindergarten. So pink. He’s a little beaten up, but what difference does it make to us,” the emigrant noted.

Start life again

Gulnara believes that moving to the shelter was the right decision. She is sure that this is the path that she and her daughter need to go through so that they can have their own different life - better, happier and more interesting. A woman is trying to return to her profession. She goes to filming with her daughter.

“I've been taking her with me since she was a baby. It was just easier before, because you fastened the sling to yourself and took it off as much as you wanted. I shot several covers for musicians in just such conditions. Now I'm asking if people are okay with having a child sitting next to me. In principle, this works if the client is normally configured,” explains Gulnara.

She dreams of improving her life, finding housing, getting rid of the shelter and starting to earn money.